- Chinese Food Guy: He comes in and buys energy drinks and cigarettes at work. Nothing wrong with that. He works as a waiter in a Chinese restaurant. That's fine. He's 26. Perfect. He has a full set of grey fake teeth, hand tattoos, and probably only weighs 90lbs soaking wet. Damn.
- McDonald's Guy: He comes in and buy cigarettes at work... everyday... two packs. Uhh... ok... He works 15 hours a week at McDonald's as a janitor. Nope, not good. He just got evicted for the second time in the last year. Nope. He's 51. Hell no!
- The Chip Guy: He delivers the chips at work. Ok, whatever, it's a steady job. He hits on me. Little awkward, but could be alright. He's short and bald. Well, that's ok. He's sort of an asshole. Ugh. Oh, and he's married with kids. REALLY!?
And that's it. Those are the only guys interested in me. Now, you tell me, am I being too picky? Are my standards too high? Is a full set of teeth, someone under the age of thirty, and someone who's actually single really too much to ask? I think not.
So, my question is this: why are these the only types that are attracted to me? To clarify, those types are creepy old, trashy young, and married assholes. And, just so we're clear, I'm not being judge-y or stereotypical here because I actually know these guys. They've been after me for two years now. Come universe, throw me a bone!
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